


Eat and Eat

by orphan_account



Category: X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Charles Has Issues, Child Abuse, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Charles, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Past Abuse, Poor Charles, Protective Erik, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, mentioned child abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-07-17 05:33:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16089095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Erik never asked about his past.He didn’t ask, Charles told.





	Eat and Eat

Erik never asked about his past.

 

They each had topics that were off limits, for Erik it was his time with Shaw, and for Charles? It was his childhood.

 

So he never asked. Not even after the nightmares made Charles shoot up on the bed, his hair stuck to his forehead from the cold sweat that had broke out on his skin. Not even as he cradled the crying, shaking man to his chest, his fingers rubbing soft circles on Charles’ back.

 

Not after he glanced at the pictures of a chubby, frowning young Charles, who’s cheeks were a rosey red and who’s stomach was round and taut. He didn’t ask questions. He knew better than to do that.

 

But this time, he didn’t need to ask. Charles told.

 

“It helped me cope.” Charles said one night, his back to Erik, who’s arm was draped across his side. Erik cracked open an eye, his eyebrow raising.

 

“Whenever he’d hit me, i’d turn to food. It...dulled the pain? I guess? It blocked out the real world.” Charles continued with a sigh, rolling over. He buried his face against Erik’s chest, his arms pulled in front of his face.

 

“I would eat and eat and eat. I’d eat until I couldn’t anymore. And then I’d cry. I was only safe when I was eating. I only *felt* safe when I was eating. It was sick. I was sick. He was sick.” Charles mumbled, and even in the dark, Erik could see the tears bubbling up in Charles’ eyes. He pulled the man closer as Charles wiped away the tears and sniffled.

 

“He’d—They’d touch me. And after...They’d poke my stomach and make fun of me. Tell me how much of a *pig* I was. And you know what I’d do? I’d eat. And as I ate, i’d cry. I didn’t know how to stop it.

 

“And then I went to school and everyone laughed. Everyone poked fun at me. Teased me. Called me piggy. Pushed me. Poked me. So I stopped eating. They didn’t notice. No one did.” He took a shuttering breath before continuing.

 

“I lost weight. A lot of it, but then I wasn’t coping. They found out I was gay. They touched me more. Beat me more. I couldn’t cope. I didn’t know how else to cope. I dropped over 100 pounds. I was at 100 pounds by the time I was 17. I—I didn’t know what to do.” Tears were threatening to pour down his cheeks, his voice barely above a whisper. Erik placed a kiss to his forehead, eyes shutting as tears pricked his eyes.

 

He knew Charles’ step-dad and son weren’t the best family ever, but this? He never would’ve imagined.

 

“Raven noticed, after awhile. She realised I wasn’t just...losing weight. She forced me to stop, made me eat. I hated it. I hated her. I put back on 50 pounds. I was back to 190 pounds by the time I started college.

 

“By then, no one cared about my weight. Sometimes they’d make a few comments about forgoing some cheeseburgers, but nothing too major. I eventually settled with myself, was content—sort of—with my body. I still didn’t like myself or what I saw in the mirror, but I wasn’t harming myself like I was.” Charles looked up at Erik, eyes watery and big. He looked so broken, so lost. Erik’s heart ached for Charles, as he kissed him again, pulling the man’s head close to his chest as tears slipped down his face.

 

“I still struggle with my weight, sometimes. I skip meals, and—and I’ve just felt *so* guilty about not telling you, I—I just had to tell you. I love you, Erik.” He finished, his voice breaking. Erik could feel the tears soaking his shirt, but he couldn’t bring himself to mind.

 

“I love you too, Charles. So, so much. I’m so sorry you had to go through all that.” He whispered, eyes glued to the wall as Charles cling to him like a child.

 

“You’re beautiful, Charles. Truly. I don’t care if you’re 200 pound or 150, i’ll still love you. You’re beautiful no matter what. I swear.” Charles shook with a silent sob, and Erik’s heart broke.

 

“You mean that?” He heard Charles mumble, eyes peering up at Erik. Erik smiled down at his sadly, and nodded, his lips pressing against Charles’ scalp.

 

“Of course I do, Charles. I love you more than anything in this world, you hear me? No matter how much you weigh.” Erik replied, his breath hot on Charles’ forehead.

 

“Thank you, Erik. God—Thank you. I love you. So much. Thank you.” Charles whispered, nuzzling up against Erik.

 

“Go to sleep, Liebling. I love you.”


End file.
